04.04.06

I must e very weary of planning to do many, many things later on while I’m feeling good and enjoying what I’m doing and accomplishing right now. If I am not weary I will slowly come to think that the joy which I draw comes from thinking about those things, this will interfere with the true source of joy, my doings of the action right then and there, and bring me to a convulsive stop.
Furthermore, the reason why I feel this way can be very complex, but some part of it, I feel, can be addressed by the fact that I am not yet very experienced in two things. Firstly I’m not experienced yet in forgoing my old ways completely at all times; this meaning I still default to habitual behaviors whenever the recognizable situations arise. Secondly, I’m not fully aware of all the facets of this new way of being, happy, responsive, and appreciative of my world in a habitual way.